Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
