D3 body, D1 cock
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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