I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize
