conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
