HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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