Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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