haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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