How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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