Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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