piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
