haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
