If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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