He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Couch. On fire.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
