Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
