**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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