so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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