I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
