and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
