so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
