my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Randomize