What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
