I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
