hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I FOUND THE LEGS
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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