So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I could fuck to npr.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Randomize
