I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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