Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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