i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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