I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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