I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Farmville is her only friend.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
