Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
