Have you finally orgasmed yet?
false alarm. still invincible.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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