Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
