god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
