Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
