I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize