you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
