My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Randomize
