Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
