If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
