u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
