I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Randomize
