butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
