I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize