There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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