Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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