I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
