just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize