thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
nutella sex= disaster
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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