guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
