Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
