I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
